My Friend Ron

I had intended to finish covering the disaster that befell the area I live in, but as so often happens in life other events derailed my plans. In this case, unwelcome but not unexpected events. So I find myself writing about a friend.

Shortly after I joined the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints in December of 2003, I was sitting in a priesthood meeting and noticed someone being wheeled in. There were obvious deformities to his face and head, the kind that surgeries cause. It was the first time I'd seen the steps convert to a lift and I wondered about the man who had just joined us. Being a new member, I was still finding my way and didn't approach him after the meeting ended. In retrospect, I regret that because I lost a little more time with a friend.

I slowly got to know him and it began with helping with the lift or pushing him in the wheelchair, I don't remember clearly which. Another friend told me Ron was his name and he'd been through some horrific surgeries in addition to his disabilities. On occasion I would visit him with the full time missionaries. I found that while Ron had trouble seeing and hearing, there was a bright intelligence quietly burning there and it usually manifested itself as a wicked sense of humor.

One Sunday, we were notified by our leadership that Ron needed a ride to appointments at Mayo Clinic, as his wife Colleen had fallen ill and couldn't drive. Being in Rochester, MN, Mayo is at the limits of my driving range due to my disability and so I waited to hear someone volunteer to take him. Long moments passed and nobody volunteered, so I did, feeling a little frustrated that there was no other. But if I hadn't, I wouldn't have really gotten to know him.

Fortunately for me, Ron had a great sense of direction and guided me easily to Mayo, me being a rookie driver on top of everything else. Didn't save us in the elevators, I still managed to get us to the wrong floor much to his amusement. That sense of humor, that wonderful willingness to look on the silly side of life while confronting constant adversity was Ron's defining trait, along with a truly huge, loving heart. We wrapped up that little adventure with a stop at Red Lobster. Oddly enough, it was all you could eat shrimp that day and I suspect Ron knew that all along. It was then I discovered his major addictions in life, Mountain Dew and shrimp. The latter I have in common with him, so we ended up eating ourselves sick, sampling every way the restaurant prepared those delicious crustaceans. To my chagrin, the very cute waitress paid more attention to him than me, but that was the effect Ron always had.

Later on, it was my pleasure to serve alongside him in the Branch clerk's office. People thought we were doing important work back there, but in reality we were goofing off. It wasn't that we didn't take our responsibilities seriously, it was just what would happen if we were left alone together. One thing that some people didn't realize about Ron was his dedication to helping others and carrying out his duties. I remember coming in and finding him going through the software tutorials that I struggled to get anyone else to train with. He always wanted to help, to actually do even when his body kept betraying him.

Above all else, Ron was a good man and never a truer warrior could you meet. His faith was strong and I think that is how he survived so many surgeries, more than anyone should ever have to have. His was a truly Christlike life, filled with love and charity toward others. Ron's obituary covers this well:

Ronald Lee Neinast

Ronald Lee Neinast, 54, of La Crosse passed away Sunday, Aug., 26, 2007,
in La Crosse.

Ronald was born Jan. 22, 1953, to Neil and Phyllis (Peterson) Neinast in Sparta, Wis. He had several birth defects, including an affliction of cerebral palsy.

His parents saw to it that he was involved in play and activities with other children, and stressed education and a strong work ethic. Ronald graduated from Hillsboro (Wis.) High School in 1971 and later graduated from Western Technical College with an associate degree in accounting and business administration.

Ronald worked at Gambles Store in Hillsboro, Hillsboro Equipment Inc. and Holiday Inns in Tomah, Wis., and Madison. In 1983, Ron suffered a brain stem stroke, which forced him to quit working.

During his life, Ron had more than 30 surgeries, including two heart surgeries in one day, suffered several broken bones in his arms and legs, and besides cerebral palsy was diagnosed with diabetes, rheumatoid arthritis and skin cancer. He also battled tumors.

His doctors have stated that he was a medical wonder with a positive attitude throughout all that he endured. He fought the good fight, and was a hero to many
people and was admired by them.

In spite of many illnesses, Ron worked as a volunteer at Gundersen Lutheran Medical Center, which he began in 1986, and in April 2006 was awarded his 10,000-hour pin.An advocate for the elderly and the disabled in the Greater La Crosse area, he was president of the City of La Crosse Disabled Parking Enforcement Assistance Council for the La Crosse police department, a position appointed by the mayor and the city council.

He was a member of the MTU-ADA and Mini Bus committees, and was transportation coordinator for the Greater La Crosse area. He was a member of the Oktoberfest Parade Committee, a volunteer for Easter Seals Lily Days, and was very active in his church as a greeter, priest and branch clerk. Ron was a member of the Happy Go Lucky Club since 1987, and currently was its president. He re-wrote the club’s bylaws.

In June 2002, Ron married the love of his life, Colleen (Sullivan) Sowa. Ron was preceded in death by his parents. Surviving him are his wife, Colleen; a daughter, Noel (Sullivan-Sowa) Van Blaricome and her husband, Jeffrey; three grandchildren, Gavin, Genevieve and Ashton; two sisters, Kathy (Archie) Crawford and Sharon (Russell) Daines II; two brothers, Dale (Marybeth) Neinast and Neil (Chris) Neinast; many nieces and nephews; aunts, uncles and cousins; and many friends.

Ron was an inspiration to me, whenever I felt down about my lot in life, I'd think about him and the trials he was going through -- and what tremendous grace he showed in handling them. Especially at the end, when things were getting worse and worse, he still kept fighting on. His spirit shone so brightly and I often think that no mortal body could house a soul that burned so brightly without failing. I wish I could have been there for him more often and been a better friend. When the time comes for me to depart this mortal realm, I'll challenge him to a foot race. I suspect he'll win.

He is missed.